Garah Common - Gerang Gerung

Garah Common n
An area authorised for the keeping of sacrificial goats.

Gapsted n, v
1. n The location, as yet undiscovered but suspected to lie somewhere beyond the orbit of Saturn, where the contents of millions of wage packets mysteriously disappear to, on Friday night.
2. v (Past tense) When you have been beaten to a parking space while fumbling for reverse, you have been Gapsted.

Garangula n
The desire to immediately respond to a Feluga (qv) with a long list of things that quite evidently are worse.

Geengee n
The sort of frantic laughter that degenerates into rapid, silent gasping. In 1927, an entire Welsh village perished through asphyxiation as a result of a prolonged bout of Geengee. The precise reason was never discovered, but is thought to have been either sheep, or lost English tourists.

Gelantipy n
The unsettling conviction held by a small child that their drawing represents a particular animal, and that they will still instantly recognise it three months later.

Gelorup n
The sound of baked beans leaving the tin in one moist, solid mass.

Gelorup

Gerang Gerung v
To make a complete mess of grammar.

Feluga - Fumar

Feluga n
The blatant lie present in the statement "There’s nothing worse..." It will be easy to show that piles, cancer and nuclear weapons are worse.

Fisherman’s Paradise n
The pub. The fishing is good, but at the end of the day, the pub’s where it’s at.

Fitzgerald n
Any collection of National Geographic magazine spanning at least 10 years with no gaps.

Five Ways n
Any road junction of at least 3 choices, without a signpost for any. [Also Four Ways.]

Footscray n (med)
A persistent infection below the toes, caused by constantly wearing the same smelly pair of cheap training shoes. cf Patchewollock.

Framlingham n
Nearly transparent parts of cold sliced meat, which resemble, but are not adequate replacement for, edible meat. Avoid them, for they are disappointingly like rubber bands, and have similar nutritional value.

Freeling v
Parking a car very carefully so as to take up a space that would actually have fitted two similar vehicles. cf Stony Pinch.

Fumar n
A solitary smoker who sits with teeth grimly clenched around their pipe, cigarette or cigar, in a place where smoking is not actually banned, but where not another soul approves of the practice. More than one Fumar has eventually been buried with their choice of smoke still clenched between locked jaws, having resolutely refused to give up their last remaining pleasure for anyone.

Failford - Father Woods Broom

Failford v
To attempt unsuccessfully to cross a creek, river, etc, in the faint hope that the water won’t be too deep for your car.

Fairbank n
An oxymoron; a contradiction in terms. There was once a fair bank, back in the dim and distant past, but word spread about its fair dealings, and people came from far and wide, just to look at this marvellous institution. As a result, no work was ever done, as genuine customers couldn’t find their way through the crowds, and the bank had to close its doors forever. The lesson was learned in financial circles, that it was better to have disgruntled customers than no customers at all.

Fairhope n
Any casual punter placing a bet on a horse race etc, without having previously studied the racing form. This will not, however, significantly affect his chances of success.

False Island n
1. The premise upon which a miscreant child justifies its heinous action.
2. The branch upon which a novice tree-lopper sits, while attacking same with a saw.

Farleigh adj
Of the expression worn by someone being talked at by their spouse, about Aunty Doris’s latest health crisis.

Fassifern n
Fassifern is the unadventurous-looking greenery that is unfortunately and unceremoniously pulled out of the ground by someone ignorant of gardening, in the belief that it is an overenthusiastic weed. Sadly, it will have been planted some months before by someone else, and will likely have cost a small fortune at the local boutique garden centre. It will also have been due to flower within the following week.

Father Woods Broom n
A generic term for any tool that has been in the family for decades. No-one will remember where it came from, but Grandad will have used it as a boy, and the patina on its handle will be lovingly admired by anyone older than 50.

Eribung - Euston

Eribung n
A brief but debilitating bout of constipation.

Errinundra conj
Used to indicate the current whereabouts of a missing item. For example, "Have you seen my shoes?" "Yes, Errinundra bed." [orig. Scottish dialect]

Errowanbang n
An unexplained noise that wakes you during the night. You will lie awake for at least 25 minutes, hardly breathing, while waiting for it to happen again. It will not.

Ettamogah n
Any mention of ‘personal’ matters, especially those of a biological or marital nature, which causes an uneasy shuffling on the part of either speaker or listener.

Eubabong n
A bum note played by the bellringers, during an important service. Played by the organist, nobody would notice the error, but the Eubabong stands out like a well-hammered carpenter’s thumb.

Eunonyhareenyha n
An extended period in the company of close and intimate friends, where ritual consumption of alcohol is undertaken, in order to reach a completely relaxed state. cf Nirranda.

Euroka Clearing n
The regular morning ritual performed by any 50-a-day smoker.

Euston n
The feeling of regret at having been caught after experiencing Currawong (qv) and following it through.